Whether you are working full time, part time or simply need a few hours a week to yourself, sooner or later, it's likely you will need child care.
But before you start to feel anxious about leaving your child in someone else’s hands, know that you're not alone. There are more than 12 million children under the age of 5 in some type of child care, and studies have shown that leaving your child with quality caregivers can have a positive impact — socially, emotionally and cognitively.
But what type of care is right for your family? From infant day care centers to nannies, there are many options for parents who need some support (and time) to work and get things done.
Making a decision is no easy task. This child care guide will help you weigh the pros, cons and costs of all the available options, along with additional resources to find care near you. The best part? Once you decide which route is best for you, you’ll soon be able to rest easy knowing your little one is in caring, capable hands.
At what age can your baby start child care?
If you enlist the help of a family member or decide to hire a nanny, you can begin child care whenever you're comfortable.
But when it comes to day care centers, some facilities have minimum age requirements, meaning they won’t accept infants until they’ve reached a certain age. You’ll need to make sure that the day care you're considering fits into your back-to-work timeline.
What are your child care options for an infant?
Day care centers
A day care center is a state-licensed facility where parents drop off their children (mostly infants, toddlers and preschoolers) for half or full days, depending on the child care center’s schedule options. These are often large centers that group children by age in classrooms, similar to a school.
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- Day care pros: Day care is a great choice if you have a job with regular, fixed hours. Day care centers offer a structured day for your child, with time for outdoor play, learning, meals and naps. Socialization is a big plus. Caregivers are often referred to as "teachers" and are either working on or have completed a degree in early childhood education or a similar field. Some day care centers double as preschools, so once your child is 2 or 3, she can transition to a more formal curriculum.
- Day care cons: A group environment works well for many kids, but if your child needs one-on-one attention to thrive or has special needs and requires additional supervision, day care may not be the best choice. If you think you’d have a hard time hearing your potty-trained child had an accident, or that the organic crackers you carefully packed for her snack somehow never found their way out of her little backpack, this may not be the route for you. Also, since rates are per child, the cost can be prohibitive for two (or more) children, even with a sibling discount.
- How much does day care cost? Fees vary, sometimes dramatically, based on where you live. And the younger the child, the more you’ll pay: By law, an infant requires a lower teacher-to-child ratio than a 4-year-old. According to a 2020 report by Child Care Aware of America, the average yearly cost of day care is around $12,304 for an infant and around $10,000 for a 4-year-old. Enrichment classes like music, tumbling and field trips aren’t always included in the basic fee structure, so expect to pay more if you want your child to participate in those activities. And make sure you aren’t late to pick up your child — late fees can run as high as $1 per minute.
Family day care
Family day care, sometimes called in-home day care or home-based day care, is similar to a day care center except it is run out of a private home with an assistant or two depending on the number of children and space.
- Family day care pros: A warm, home-like environment with a smaller group of kids results in a smaller kid-to-teacher ratio, along with the ability to mix age groups, meaning siblings will most likely stay together. Some home-based day care also is more flexible with schedules.
- Family day care cons: Since there is less supervision, trust is critical — and while not always the case, caregivers may not be required to fulfill as many educational requirements as those in a day care setting.
- How much does family day care cost? The cost of an in-home day care is typically less than day care centers. The national average is around $800 per month, according to the Center for American Progress.
Nanny
A nanny is a career caregiver who watches all the children in a family. For the (relatively few) parents who can provide a dedicated bedroom and bathroom, a live-in nanny is an option; otherwise, nannies are referred to as "live out." Some nannies may do light housekeeping as part of their contract.
- Nanny pros: A nanny can offer one-on-one care and build a long-term relationship with your child. Nannies typically want to stay with a family they like for many years, starting with newborn child care and then caring for the child as they get older, plus any subsequent siblings.
- Nanny cons: You’re reliant on one person. If your nanny gets a stomach bug or a flat tire, you’ll need to organize backup care. Your nanny will also need to take time off throughout the year for vacations and family obligations, for which you’ll also need to arrange for backup care if you don’t coordinate their time off with your vacation time.
- How much does a nanny cost? It depends on location, with an average hourly rate at $19.14 per hour for one child, according to the International Nanny Association’s most recent pay survey — that works out to $3,062 per month (if they work an average of 40 hours per week). And don’t forget: When you hire a nanny, you become an employer — which means that on top of their salary, you need to provide disability insurance. Plus, the IRS requires you to pay employment tax if you pay a nanny more than $2,400 per year. There are, however, several qualifiers and exceptions, so check the IRS guidelines. And because of how close families tend to get with beloved nannies, birthday and holiday gifts and annual raises or bonuses usually become part of the package as well.
Au pair
Typically, an au pair is someone from another country between 18 to 26 who comes to the U.S. on a cultural exchange via a J-1 Visa. Specialized agencies screen and train candidates and facilitate the process. Au pairs live in your house, care for your kids for a predetermined number of hours per week (no more than 45 hours), usually for a period of 12 months with the ability to extend the placement up to a maximum of another 12 months.
- Au pair pros: You’re getting full-time, in-home, one-on-one care for much less than what a nanny costs. This is partly because the au pairs consider being hosted in the U.S. as part of their compensation, and partly because the U.S. government sets the stipend that such workers can be paid. An au pair can be a good choice if you have several school age children with busy schedules, or if your work schedule fluctuates. You can set the au pair’s schedule on a weekly basis, as long as the total number of hours doesn’t exceed the agreed upon limit. Many families also love the cultural aspect: Since au pairs come from foreign countries, they bring the opportunity of immersing the kids in a new language along with stories, pictures, music and recipes from their homeland.
- Au pair cons: Unlike career nannies, au pairs don’t necessarily want to make child care their life’s work — which means they may not have the same level of enthusiasm and devotion. And while they must speak at least basic English, they might not be familiar with the U.S. — let alone your town or neighborhood. They’re also not professionally trained child care workers (although they are required to have a minimum of 32 hours of child care training before they start). They can’t watch infants younger than 3 months without an adult around, they need at least 200 hours of training to watch kids under the age of 2 and you can’t leave your kids with an au pair for extended periods of time (say, if you go on a business trip or an adults-only vacation).
- How much does an au pair cost? No less than $783 a month ($196 a week), although you can choose to pay more, but the duties and hours remain the same. The agency insures the applicants it places, so you don’t need to.
Relative caregiver
A relative caregiver is a family member (mother, sister, father, aunt, etc.) who cares for your child, either at their home or yours.
- Relative caregiver pros: It might seem like a dream come true to have your newborn day care provided by a relative: Who better to love and nurture your child?
- Relative caregiver cons: Keep in mind that caring for a newborn is a very demanding job. Is the relative in question up to the task? Your mom might indeed be willing, but older parents might not remember just how much work a baby can be. You should also consider how this situation could impact your relationship. For example, will you be comfortable telling your relative how you want things done? Do you think you and this relative could weather any potential conflicts that arise? If not, it may not be worth jeopardizing your relationship by creating a potentially volatile situation. If you consider these issues and still want to proceed with relative care, be clear from the start about pay (if there is money involved), hours and duties, and be sure to have a back-up plan in place for days when your caregiver is ill or away.
- How much does relative care cost? Up to you, though you may want to at least offer a weekly stipend for costs related to caring for your child.
Babysitter
A babysitter is someone who takes care of a child in your home for a short period of time and is paid by the hour. Although they often are high schoolers, college students and even teachers looking to make extra money may be interested in working as a babysitter. Due to their limited weekday availability, babysitters are usually used on the weekends or evenings for the occasional night out.
- Babysitter pros: If all you want is someone who will keep your child happy for a few hours, a babysitter is an inexpensive solution.
- Babysitter cons: Babysitters are usually not trained in any formal way and may not have enough experience to properly care for young children solo. They tend to work out well with school age kids who are fairly self-sufficient. And because babysitters are usually on call, their availability isn’t always a given.
- How much does a babysitter cost? It varies based on where you live. In Denver, for example, babysitters earn under $15 an hour on average, but in New York City, you’re looking at upwards of about $18 per hour, according to UrbanSitter’s 2020 pay survey. Sitters who are certified in CPR and first aid command more. And no matter where you live, you may be expected to pay for transportation to and from your house, as well as a higher rate for hours after midnight and holiday weekends.
Overnight nanny
Also known as a "night nanny" (not to be confused with a night nurse, who is an expert in newborn care and supports new parents in the first few weeks of a child’s life), an overnight nanny is someone who stays overnight with a child — often because a single parent works nights or is on a business trip.
In a way, this is an easy gig for the sitter as the kid(s) will be asleep most of the time anyway — unless bedtime is a challenge. In order to make this arrangement a success, establish routines and procedures in advance. And if you have a baby, knowledge of safe sleep best practices is an absolute must.
- Overnight nanny pros: If you work the night shift, it’s comforting to know your child is in her own bed with everything she might need or want right there.
- Overnight nanny cons: If your child has a hard time settling down at night, is a restless sleeper prone to nightmares or has bedwetting issues, you might be better off with someone the child is more familiar with like a grandparent, aunt or other close relative or friend.
- How much does an overnight nanny cost? Overnight sitters generally receive the same hourly rate as daytime sitters in your area.
Choosing the best child care for your baby
Where you decide to leave your baby — in group day care, in-home daycare, with a nanny or with a relative — comes with its own set of benefits and challenges. Narrow down which option is right for you and your family by considering the following:
- What can you afford to pay monthly?
- Do you need child care every day or just a few hours a week?
- Is your schedule flexible or rigid? Do you often work late hours unexpectedly? Are you able to leave your place of work every day at the same time?
- How close do you want your child to be to your home or work during the day?
- Are you comfortable managing someone in your home and/or living in your home full time?
If you know you want to put your baby in day care, it’s never too early to start looking into group programs. That’s because many facilities, especially those that accept infants, often have a long wait list — especially in large cities like New York and Los Angeles.
If you want to hire a nanny or choose an in-home daycare (and even though finding a spot there isn't quite as competitive as it is for a group program), you should still start your search at least two months before you plan to head back to work.
If you’re planning to leave your baby with a relative caregiver, make sure to do a couple of dry runs well in advance of your first day back on the job in case the new arrangement doesn’t work out (for you or your relative) and you need to find a backup option.
Where can you find a caregiver?
Ready to start your search for your child care? For accredited day care centers, start with the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), which maintains a list of accredited facilities and is updated on Fridays.
You can also check out your state’s government website. It often has a directory of licensed child care providers (including in-home day care options) and their locations, health and safety details, ages of children served, capacity and hours of care.
Another great way to find top notch candidates or reputable centers is word of mouth. Don’t be shy about asking parents you see in your community if they can recommend a great infant caregiver.
Nursery school teachers and your child’s pediatrician are also good sources, as are bulletin boards at your doctor’s office, library or place of worship.
And if you are looking for a nanny but want some help finding the right caregiver for your family, there are agencies that specialize in helping you find the perfect match. There is usually a fee involved, typically a percentage of the nanny’s annual salary, but the nannies are vetted and a reputable agency offers a replacement guarantee. Of course, regardless of where you find your nanny, you should always call the references yourself and confirm there’s been a thorough background check.
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