Yes, absolutely, no matter how often the interrogators in your family and friend circles tell you otherwise. There’s nothing wrong with keeping your baby’s name secret while you're pregnant, if that’s the route you want to go. Plenty of expectant parents wait until their baby is born to announce the name.
Of course, there are arguments to be made for revealing your chosen baby name (or names) sooner than that, so you will ultimately have to weigh the pros and cons of keeping the name a secret or sharing it, then make a decision.
Here's why you may want to keep your baby name a secret under after your new arrival is born and why you might decide to tell the world your choice before the big day.
Reasons to keep your baby's name a secret
Other family members may be offended
Sharing the moniker you’ve chosen before your baby boy is born gives your Uncle Arthur IV months to nag you about why you should go with Arthur V instead. Or if you’ve chosen to name your daughter after your mother, your mother-in-law will have time to stew over why she was overlooked.
But when you wait until the baby’s arrival, the name takes a backseat to how adorable and perfect the new grandchild/niece/nephew is — and relatives will probably get over their gripes a whole lot faster.
Names come with baggage
People always have associations with a name — a nasty ex, say, or a boring co-worker — that makes them automatically critical of it. And if you love the name you’ve chosen, do you really want to hear about a bully of the same name who teased your best friend in third grade?
Once your baby is born, the name will be his and his alone, and all those reminders will be forgotten.
More About Baby Names
A secret baby name builds anticipation
Especially if you’re sharing the baby’s sex with family and friends, it might be nice to let the name be a surprise. After nine months, they'll be dying to know what you picked and excited about the big reveal.
Having your own little secret is special
When it feels like everyone has an opinion or advice about every aspect of your pregnancy — "You’re carrying big!", "It’s definitely a girl!" and "You are going to breastfeed, right?" — it’s nice to have something that’s just for you.
Reasons to share your baby's name before you give birth
Family and friends will feel more included
Your family and friends will not only be touched that you shared your baby name with them ahead of time, but they may even feel more connected to your pregnancy and baby. Picture your mom talking to your baby in utero: "Hi, Austin. Grandma loves you!"
Monogrammed baby gear
You’ll get plenty of personalized towels, blankets, diaper bags and clothes as baby-shower gifts if you share the name in advance. This may seem like a trivial point (and, okay, it is), but baby items with your child’s name on them will usually be the ones you save as keepsakes.
You claim dibs
If you and a few of your friends are all pregnant around the same time, announcing the baby name you picked puts it off-limits (or at least makes it yours first) for anyone who might deliver before you — especially if the name is pretty popular. He might not be the only Finn in your crowd, but he’ll be the first.
People won’t have to guess
Or needle you by whining, "What’s the big deal? It’s just a name!" Or say things like, "As long as you don’t name him Rufus!" when indeed that’s the name you’ve chosen.
Once everyone holds your beautiful baby, they will all agree that his name — whether or not you shared it beforehand — suits him perfectly. That’s the thing about names: Children make them what they are, not the other way around.
Here’s to your baby’s beautiful name, secret or not,
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